


Not So Broken

by IShipItAllAndThenSome



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Communication, Episode: s3e04 The Faithful, Established Relationship, F/F, Family Feels, Family Issues, Motherhood, Unmarked POV Jumping, and yes the title is a reference to the last song in the episode, look canon is stupid so Fuck That they're in love and they're talking it out, which is my Favorite Song
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-01
Updated: 2017-11-01
Packaged: 2019-01-27 17:26:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 874
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12586952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IShipItAllAndThenSome/pseuds/IShipItAllAndThenSome
Summary: Alex and Maggie love each other and talk about their feelings and fears and future. Becausefuckcanon and its out of character characterization.





	Not So Broken

“Good morning.”

Maggie yawns, stretching as she pads into the kitchen. Her tank top is wrinkled up around her ribs, smushed into holding that shape when she scooted down to curl into Alex’s side when she came home at hell o’clock. 

Alex knows it has to have been then, because Maggie curled into her side and never moved away. Because Maggie loves her, and Maggie trusts her, and Maggie feels safe with her.

They’ve worked so hard to communicate, so hard not to build walls the way they’ve learned to all their lives, and Alex hasn’t been keeping up her end of the bargain. 

“Morning,” she says, kissing Maggie softly, fingers grazing her bare shoulder. “I made coffee.”

“Mm. Love you.”

“I love you, too.” Alex lets out a shaky sigh, clinging to Maggie’s strap to steady herself. “I love you so much.”

Maggie hasn’t even taken a sip yet, but her perfect mug of coffee is the farthest thing from her mind. “Babe,” she murmurs, pulling Alex into a hug, “something’s bugging you, isn’t it? What’s going on?”

“Oh, _god._ ” Alex shakes her head, nose rubbing over the arch of Maggie’s collarbone. “I was trying not to let on. I didn’t want to upset you.”

“Upset me? Alex - ”

“I want kids.”

Maggie blinks owlishly. She can feel tears on her skin. 

“Oh.”

Alex pulls back, furiously shaking her head as she wipes her eyes. “No! No, you’re - this isn’t on you. You don’t want kids. You made that clear. And I - I love you, Maggie, so much, more than anything, which is why I didn’t tell you. Because I didn’t want to hurt you, I didn’t want to fight about it.”

“We’re not fighting. Are we? Is this a fight?”

“I don’t want it to be.” Alex sniffles and wishes she could be eloquent right now. “Maggie…”

Maggie reaches up and thumbs away a fresh tear. “I knew.”

“You - you knew?”

“You’re fantastic at lying to yourself, Alex, but you suck at lying to me.”

With a wet laugh, Alex looks away - towards the window. Part of her expects Kara, with her horrible sense of timing, to show up right now with donuts; part of her wants it. Most of her hopes Kara never hears this conversation. “Why didn’t you bring it up?”

“Because it scares me. Families scare me.” Maggie licks her lips, gripping the kitchen counter. “Especially after the shower. My dad - he _tried,_ Alex, and it wasn’t enough. Disappointing him felt so awful. I don’t _ever_ want to make our little girl feel that way.”

“Little girl?”

Alex’s voice is flat, like she’s actively suppressing a hopeful upward inflection, and Maggie sniffles. 

“I lied, too.”

“Oh.”

“When I was a little girl, I didn’t imagine having a family. Being married, dating - everything - it all sounded wrong. And then I found out that you could like girls, in - god, in Current Events. Eliza Wilkie did a report on the Massachusetts gay marriage bill, and suddenly, I was dawdling in the magazine aisle at the pharmacy looking at girls in white dresses.

“And you know how bad _that_ went.”

“Maggie.” Alex’s heart breaks in her chest all over again. Maggie’s so strong about everything, all the time, and she’s _actually_ good at putting on a brave face. Alex hates not being skilled at spotting the differences between fake and real Happy Maggie yet, and part of her thinks its because Maggie carries so much sadness, so much heartbreak of her own, that she can’t ever put it down. 

She wraps her arms around Maggie, and kisses her hair, and says nothing.

“But after that, I tried really hard not to get attached. My relationships all flopped. I never really had to think about white dresses and - and basinets and all the different varietals of showers. And now that I have to, god, Alex, I’m so scared.”

“I know.” Alex rubs her back, closes her eyes tight. “I know, baby.”

“What do we do?”

“We don’t need to have kids right away.”

Maggie laughed. “Good to know.”

“I just meant - right now, we are doing one of the most stressful things people can do: planning a wedding. We both work busy, high-stress, government-funded jobs. Neither of us are in a place where having kids is a good idea.”

“Sounds about right.”

“So, for now, we can put that on the back burner. Okay?” Alex leans back just far enough to look Maggie in the eyes, cupping her face in her hands. “None of this is insurmountable, and whatever conclusion we come to, however long it takes to get there, I’m still going to love you the whole way through.”

“Wow, Danvers,” Maggie sniffs. “You’re such a sap.”

With a one-shouldered shrug, Alex just smiles and says, “I know.”

She’s _incredibly_ thankful that her boss likes her on days like today, because being fifteen minutes late for work to talk through things with the woman she loves and is going to marry (and, someday, raise a little girl with) is more than worth it, and she will say that to anyone who asks. 

Including, in two years’ time, that little girl, who grows up strong and smart and so, so loved. 

And really badass.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I know I need to post chapters of Under The Same Sun, but I'm, like, having a Day, and I have homework I need to do, but last night, I came home after an oral exam and passed out five minutes before Supergirl started, only for my mommy issues to wake me up for Alex crying about wanting to be a mom and going home to her fiancée and not being able to talk to her about it. For "reasons." So I had to write this, and I had to post it, and it's stupidly short and I should be doing other things and I'm sorry about it all.


End file.
